Welcome 2012!

Thank God it's 2012. Not that I regret, or wish time didn't happen - but I expect so much more out of this year than 2011. I started writing a post in late December and it was going to be a very depressing post about how everything is such a cluster. Parts of December were probably the lowest of the low for me thus far in life - and I was about to blast it out to the world. Maybe it's good I was distracted and didn't get that blog written.

My blog now is one of hope and revelation and joy. I went to Passion (a giant conference for 18-25 year olds) and I have learned more in the past 4 days than ever (in a very short amount of time). I've learned more about God, and more about myself and the beautiful connection between the two. It shocked me actually - for all the numerous mission trips I take, I assume it will 'click' most while holding an orphan or feeding those on the streets, but somehow it 'clicked' while standing in the Georgia Dome with 42,000 people singing praise to God. It may take quite a few posts to digest all I have experienced. I will start by saying what this blog will morph into, God willing.

For history sake - I have successfully lived 24 years without offending anyone. That may be quite bold to say, but I really cannot think of anything I have done that has offended anyone and if it has that I haven't crawled with apologies. I always thought life would be better if I gathered all the friends possible (a slew of people that would 'like' me), and to do that I felt I had to succeed in never made anyone uncomfortable. To my friends that don't love God, I lessen my love for God. To my friends that love God, I heighten my love for God. Both groups think I'm great - that was my goal right?

But really is that the best life. That's not an exciting life. That's not a life of identity. It's a life where I have more dinners with friends than I have days, where I continually try to keep up with everyone, where I am never truly myself. Where I constantly question who I am.

So I will blog more - but I will not make everything offense-less. I will spill out what I'm thinking whether that's physical, emotional, or spiritual battles or accomplishments. So it's out there officially. I love God. Call it my New Years Resolution to live this way.